It’s been a tough month for me. Managing a child with Special Needs is tough on its own, but just two weeks’ ago we lost our beautiful German Shepherd dog Max, lost a large amount of money owing to the bushfires here in Victoria and hubby away for a few weeks’ during the school holidays with a few little tempers fraying. Now of course it’s never what happens to us, it’s how we respond. However, it’s super important to know your limits, learn to say no and keep moving. After all, we don’t serve anyone (ourselves included) if we fall apart. So how on earth do you keep the wheels on the bus when you feel as though all four are falling off all at once? Let’s investigate this further.
Now my disclaimer here is that I am no Psychologist or Psychiatrist. I’m not a Counsellor or any type of helping professional. I have, however, studied NLP, Life Coaching and simply observed human behaviour over a very long period of time working my MLM business so I think I have a fair idea after speaking to thousands of people over 27 years, what makes people tick. And sadly for the majority of the population, it doesn’t take a lot to knock them off balance. You can absolutely show someone how they can live the life they have always dreamed of – the reality is that most are unwilling to do what it takes to make that happen irrespective of their intentions. When you know this, it makes running your business a whole lot easier. New recruits in particular are so excited (which is awesome) and they want to share what they are doing with everyone, talk to 5 people who say no and then Uncle Bob tells them what they are doing is a scam and the Government will catch up with them and put them in to gaol – and so they quit. Any of us that have been in business for long enough have experienced this. If you look at any top athlete – it’s pretty similar. They will probably have had more misses, losses, strikes etc during their careers (just Google Michael Jordan and Babe Ruth to find out what I mean here). I even experienced this recently with a car I currently have up for sale. The guy wanting to buy it was super keen – then he brought his ‘mate’ to come and have a look who poked holes in it all over the place and Mr Super Keen ended up walking away. It’s what we do – we’re social creatures and we’re also typically lazy relying on the opinions of others to make decisions for us. It’s just human nature.
As I said, it’s never what happens to us, but how we deal with what happens to us. We all have a limit and we all have inbuilt mechanisms that send us a signal when we’ve really had enough. Our bodies are marvellous machines really telling us precisely what is really going on all of the time. Stress usually has a way of showing up in the body somewhere – either via illness or pain. Most of the time these can be directly linked to an emotional disturbance. We can also shut down, retreat, yell and have a temper tantrum. You’ll know for yourself what occurs for you when stress builds up and gets too much. They key is getting it early and acting on it.
Your own level of personal development will determine how long you are taken out of the game. For some of us, it can be hours’, days’, weeks’, months’, years’ and for some – a lifetime. The quicker you are able to manage your emotions, the more harmonious your life will be. Let’s face it – life isn’t fair. And you are not always in control. But you can choose your emotions and actions wisely. Now I mention personal development here and it’s crucial to do daily for at least 1 hour. Starting your day positively is another strategy to keep you high in the vibrational frequency that you operate at your optimal. This will better equip you for when life throws those curve balls. I start my day meditating for 10 minutes’. I find that when my mind is quiet – really quiet – I tend to get answers to questions, solutions to problems and I don’t get as upset when things don’t go my way as I used to. There really is no shortcut here – it’s a daily practise both personal development and a strong positive morning routine. There’s no secret sauce or magical remedy. And more often than not the simple stuff usually works the best.
But what happens when you’re overwhelmed and life has thrown way too many curve balls over a very short period of time? You can feel yourself struggling to cope with daily stuff, you’re tired, not eating properly, finding yourself making excuses to get out of stuff that you know you love, you’re feeling frazzled and close to exploding. Okay, this is the time you have full permission to withdraw and take some time out for you. I’m guessing you already know the stuff that supports you in feeling relaxed and rejuvenated – go do it. Whether that be walking the dog, getting a massage or a facial or your nails done, lunch with a friend, playing sport, working out, doing Yoga, meditating, a mini break – whatever it is for you. And never, ever feel guilty or like you are letting anyone down. You’re not. We all need a break once in a while (that’s why annual leave was created). It’s impossible to be the best parent, team leader, friend – you fill in the blank – if you are not adequately caring for yourself. We can’t all be on our A-game all the time, let’s just be honest there. What is important is that you don’t allow yourself to disappear down a rabbit hole of negativity, identify your key indicators of when you feel yourself slipping and doing what you need to do to get yourself back on track. Everyone around you will be grateful you did it, instead of allowing your fuse to burn out and saying and/or doing something you may end up spending the rest of your life regretting.
Week after next I’m taking off for Noosa in Queensland for a week. Alone. I’ll still be working, but mixing it with beach walks, massages and facials, swimming, working out, playing a bit of tennis, reading, meditating, eating deliciousness and no doubt I’ll throw in a bit of retail therapy there as well. All these things recharge my batteries. And I know I’ll return home a better Mum, team leader, wife, friend and community contributor. You can’t flog a dead horse (which is a terrible analogy btw) – and it’s equally true for us. Once the tank is empty, it needs to be refilled. You can’t run a car on an empty tank and we are exactly the same. I’d love to hear what recharges you. And what you do regularly to keep your emotions in check. Let’s all share so together we can make the world of MLM a more positive and productive and fun place. Take good care of yourself.