I am a proud Gen X woman. We were born between the mid-1960s right up until the early 1980s. Our journey to self-realization and empowerment has been marked by both quiet resilience, courage, tolerance, relentless societal pressure, peppered with all manner of conflicting and confusing narratives. Growing up, many of us were subtly, yet systematically, indoctrinated with misogynistic messages—messages that shaped our perceptions of self-worth and our roles in society then expectations from life. Now this blog post is in no way apportioning blame to Baby Boomers or in fact anyone nor any generation. I do believe that one arrives at an age where we start questioning the various messaging we received as children, then teenagers, young adults and reflect on how those messages have shaped our current self-worth and in turn our life purpose.
The Cultural Landscape of Our Childhood
To understand the challenges faced by our generation of women, it’s essential to look at the cultural and societal backdrop of our formative years. These were the years when traditional gender roles were still deeply ingrained in society, even as the feminist movements of the 1960s and 70s began to push for change. I for one was born as the result of an affair – which obviously was extremely taboo right throughout the 1970s. My Mother raised me alone and was a fiercely independent woman. Having said that, I observed very closely the relationships she had with the various men in her life and made all manner of meaning out of those interactions. The media back then and pop culture in general, and sometimes even educational systems of the time were rife with subliminal—and sometimes overt—messaging that reinforced the idea that a woman’s value was intrinsically linked to her appearance (I distinctly remember my Mother spending a lot of time making up every morning and carefully crafting her clothing and hair), her ability to please others (and in particular males) and her role within the home.
TV shows, movies, and advertisements often portrayed women as secondary characters—housewives, secretaries, love interests and oftentimes not as particularly intelligent either—whose main purpose was to support and serve the men in their lives. I recently saw an interview with Reese Witherspoon who says that it’s deeply ingrained in Hollywood even now with many scripts she has read quite literally giving the female lead the dialogue of appearing confused and asking the male character “what to do”. It’s these kinds of stereotyping that disappointingly continues. These portrayals are not just entertainment; they were a reflection of the societal norms that young women were expected to internalize. The “perfect” woman was one who was beautiful, demure, and subservient—her ambitions secondary to her duty as a wife and mother. I recall even well into my 20s being treated as a sex object by some of my employers. Even the other day, I spoke with someone who was forced out of her employment owing to sexual harassment and just yesterday I read an Instagram post with quite literally dozens of women complaining of being sexually harassed on flights! There is still so much work to be done …
The Impact of Misogynistic Messages
For many Generation X women, these pervasive messages planted the seeds of self-doubt and internalized and perpetuated misogyny. They learned to measure their worth by their ability to conform to societal expectations—expectations that were often unattainable, contradictory and mostly confusing. On one hand, they were told to be independent and pursue careers, thanks to the progress made by the women’s liberation movement. On the other, they were expected to maintain traditional roles at home and prioritize family over personal ambition. We started to ask ourselves “can we really have it all?”
This duality created a constant tension. Women who sought careers faced guilt for not being “good enough” mothers or wives. Women who chose not to have children were considered ‘selfish’. Those who chose to stay home often felt undervalued in a society that increasingly equated success with professional achievement. Those who put their children in child care questioned their reasoning in allowing someone else to raise their children while they worked to pay the child care fees (guilty as charged). The result was a generation of women who, despite their achievements, often felt like they were never quite enough. Once again, my hand is well and truly up. And it’s tough not to feel just slightly resentful about that. In fact it cost me my corporate career (not that that was a bad thing really.)
Breaking Free from the Past
As we moved into the new millennium, many began to recognize the deeply embedded misogynistic narratives that had shaped their lives. We started to rebel against our Mothers (both inadvertently and outwardly). The advent of the internet, social media, and the #MeToo movement provided platforms for women to share their experiences and challenge the status quo. Slowly but surely, Generation X women have been reclaiming their narratives, rejecting the narrow definitions of womanhood they were once taught to accept.
However, the journey is far from over. The legacy of these early messages still lingers, influencing how Generation X women navigate their careers, relationships, and self-image. But by acknowledging and confronting these issues, they are not only healing themselves but also paving the way for future generations to grow up in a world where their worth is not defined by outdated and oppressive norms.
Moving Forward
With the recent Paris Olympics, we saw the greatest representation of women ever before in history. And this goes back to the story of Generation X women and our narrative. It’s one of quiet strength, tolerance, courage and resilience and paving the way. We really are the sandwich generation in demonstrating to Millenials and Gen Z what is possible. Who doesn’t love that? Despite the misogynistic messages we have been raised with, we have managed to carve out spaces for ourselves, challenging the very norms that sought to limit us. We are the most outspoken, strong, independent, charismatic, confident and most diverse of any other women of any generation past (just look at the diverse female athletes at the Olympics this year). As we continue to push for gender equality, it’s crucial to recognize and honour the unique struggles of our generation and the progress we have made—often against great odds. In the end, the true power of Generation X women lies in our ability to question, to resist and to redefine what it means to be a woman in a world that has too often tried to tell us who we should be and what we should do. Our journey is a testament to the enduring spirit of women everywhere, a reminder that the fight for equality is not just about changing laws or breaking glass ceilings—it’s about changing minds, starting with our own and in turn our daughters too.