Let’s be honest – getting older comes with a lot of perks (wisdom, confidence a well-curated skincare routine), but it also brings challenges that seem to hit a little differently – and sometimes can feel harder – than they used to. What once felt like a speed bump in our 30s can feel like a full-on mountain in our 50s and beyond.
Whether it’s the loss of a loved one, a career change, health concerns, in my case currently, the sale of a property or even the quiet unravelling of old identities we’ve outgrown, midlife can stir up some soul-level turbulence and right now I am definitely feeling it! But here’s the truth and we don’t hear enough: it’s okay to slow down and step away. In fact, it’s necessary.
We Process Differently Now – And That’s Not a Flaw. It’s our Superpower!
When we were younger, we were expected to bounce back quickly. Cry a little, push through and jump into the next thing. But as we age, the depth of our experiences grows and so does the emotional weight they carry. That means our processing time often needs to grow too. And that’s not weakness – it’s wisdom. In fact, it’s mojo.
We know now that true healing, true clarity, true transformation doesn’t happen on a deadline. It happens in stillness and solitude. In quiet reflection. In allowing ourselves to feel all the things – not just shove them down and slap on a smile like we once did for our boss (remember that?)
The Myth of Constant Productivity.
In a culture obsessed with productivity, we’ve been taught to power through. But what if powering down was actually the most powerful thing we could do? You know what they say about your laptop if it’s giving you issues – switch it off or restart it and we are the exact same!
It takes courage to say, “I need a minute.” It takes strength to step back from the noise of life to recalibrate and reset. Whether that looks like taking a weekend alone, dialling down your commitments or just letting the dishes sit while you sit with yourself – it’s all valid and very, very mentally healthy.
Sometimes we don’t need another to-do list. We need a “don’t do” list.
Don’t explain yourself.
Don’t push through the pain.
Don’t rush the healing.
Don’t make the decision today.
Give yourself permission to be in the process of. Be okay with saying “I’ll get back to you on that.”
Resetting the Internal Compass.
The beautiful thing about hitting pause is that it gives us a chance to listen – to what we truly want, need and value now. Not what we were told to want at 25, not what our career demanded at 40, but what actually aligns with the woman we are today. It’s not about who we are becoming, it’s all about who we are and who we are being in this very moment and being very attuned to that.
That’s the real reset. Not just catching your breath, but reclaiming your direction and your self.
And yes, it might feel scary to step away from life as usual. But clarity lives in the quiet. And when we give ourselves the grace to retreat, we come back with a deeper sense of purpose and a much more stable compass.
If you’re navigating a challenge right now – something that’s knocked the wind out of you (and boy am I feeling this right now), know this:
You don’t have to have it all figured out.
You don’t have to move fast.
And you absolutely don’t have to “be strong” in the way the world defines it.
Sometimes, the bravest thing you can do is simply stop … and listen to your heart. Let it whisper the next right step. For me it’s allowing others to pick up the slack and step away from the stuff that causes me stress and anxiety. And it’s perfectly okay to own that and be brutally honest about it. Speaking our truth is oftentimes the most powerful thing we can do.
Midlife isn’t about having all the answers. It’s about honouring the questions and giving yourself time and space to feel into the woman who holds them with grace.
So if you need to step back, do it. Life will wait. For me, it’s allowing the sales process instead of being caught up in the details of it. Sometimes you have to relinquish control of things and just allow the Universe/God/Spirit/Energy to do their bit.
And when you’re ready to return, you’ll do it on your terms – wiser, softer and more in tune than ever before. That’s the real power move.